Big Black Flashlight, Swinging in the Night

Citizen Flashlight

The citizen crime investigator walks tall through the lawless desert wielding a three-cell Maglite. His big black flashlight swings a long white beam of safety along the Racquet Club Crime Corridor in Pimp Springs. The flashlight is a necessity in the desert darkness. Walking at night in Palm Springs without a light so people can see you is like riding a bike on a busy street at night. Walking in Palm Springs is dangerous because hardly anybody does it and so drivers are not expecting you. This entire gay desert is really just LA’s backyard to me, same crime per capita, same vibe. I love it. I love LA and I love the desert so much that I want to eat it. I love big black tools . . .

citizen investigator flashlight

There have been two recent pedestrian fatalities in Palm Springs and one of them was a resident in my complex! Driver’s get right up on top of me as a pedestrian and so I walk around with a flashlight that doubles as both a defensive and offensive tool. I’m not a law enforcement officer but I like men in of uniform. I especially like it when black cops get out of uniform.  It hasn’t actually happened yet, so for now, I’ll just hang onto my big black flashlight . . .

Citizen Pedestrian

The only light controlled pedestrian crosswalk between me and the desert is located near a few convenience stores and fast food restaurants. The huge vacant lots in the neighborhood are owned by corrupt real estate developer John Wessman. Mr. Wessman is also the local slumlord providing affordable housing to methamphetamine addicts and the people who love them. A few months ago I almost got hit by an SUV while I was crossing the highway, so now I only cross at the light. As a result I walk past the dumpy apartments, vacant lots and tawdry businesses. The well-funded county homeless shelter operates a shuttle bus that conveniently stops at this location to ferry clients to the modern, recently constructed shelter built outside of town near the 10 Freeway.  

citizen pedestrian

Also in this neighborhood is an open air drug market in the alley behind the 7-11 rivals street level heroin distribution at 8th & Broadway in downtown LA in terms of blatantness.  Vendors call out after you. They would probably sell you anything you ask for. These brazen criminals could probably even aid and abet gay pedophile human trafficking if you asked them. These criminals could probably set up child copulators up with Mexican parents who sell kids to pedophiles. I ignore the sordid drug pushers by avoiding walking down the alley, I just walk a half-block up and walk down a beautiful residential street instead. The desert is checkerboarded into white and black, high-crime and low-crime, just like any other city. If you drive down the wrong street in Palm Springs you can only get depressed, if you drive down the wrong street in LA you could get killed.

Citizen Crime Investigator

My light beam swings down the sidewalk and across the street right onto two tweakers tweaking. I shine my piercing police flashlight directly onto them as they slink away.  Tall white girl in tiny white shorts and boots with a short Mexican in long dark shorts and white socks and sandals. My adrenaline was pumping, I was assaulting two criminals on the street with my flashlight beam! I was kind of scared but they just retreated further back into the shadows of a huge vacant lot with no exit.  I just kept my screaming white hot laser beam on them.  My entire assault lasted about two full minutes and then I continued walking down the highway.

human trafficking investigator

Last night my big black flashlight was swinging down the sidewalk when an African passed me by. The sketchy young black man pretended to someone in a car passing by and he turned and flashed the car a gang sign to avoid me seeing his face. I just kept walking down the highway swinging my big black flashlight.

citizen advocate


By Dean McAdams

Born a poor peckerwood in a Tujunga holler, Dean practiced secrets of the ancient & modern masters to end up liberated in the coastal paradise of West L.A.