TEN YEARS AFTER: Quantum Self-Inquiry, Part 1 of 3

1. Quantum Self-Inquiry

QUANTUM BEACH: In the summer of 2005 when my eighteen month stay at Milestones Ranch Malibu ended I drove down Kanan Dume Road and lived on the beach in my RV. My black German shepherd Dharma and I were locals on Westward Beach Road for three years.

I went to lots of AA meetings, wrote about quantum science and other consciousness related topics, while doing just enough contract paralegal work to buy dog food. Quantum was the zeitgeist back then and the word seems a little redundant now. Here is a twelve chapter discussion of quantum theory and consciousness published in three separate blogs.


I think I can safely say that nobody understands quantum mechanics.”
–Richard Feynman (1965 Nobel for Quantum Electrodynamics)

Those who are not shocked when they first come across quantum theory cannot possibly have understood it.”
–Niels Bohr (1922 Nobel for Structure of the Atom)

On the one hand, this is an acutely paradoxical, puzzling, conceptually confusing theory. On the other hand, we have no option of throwing it out or neglecting it because it is the most proven tool for predicting the behaviors of physical systems that we have ever had in our hands.” –David Alpert, Ph.D. 

quantum theoryThe term quantum was first applied to science by the German physicist Max Planck in 1900. Quantum is a Latin word that simply means amount or quantity. It is used to mean the smallest unit of any physical property, such as energy or matter.

The universe seems to be governed by two sets of laws. In our everyday classical world, meaning at roughly our size and time scales, things are described by Newton’s laws of motion. However, when we get down to a small scale, to the level of atoms, a different set of laws takes over. These are the quantum laws of the Planck Scale.

Classical physics was deterministic and reductionist; quantum physics is probabilistic and holistic.

Most importantly quantum physics has erased the sharp Cartesian distinction between subject and object, observer and observed.

In quantum physics the observer influences the object observed. There are no isolated observers of a mechanical universe, but everything participates in the universe.

It is impossible to observe things passively. What is the sound of one electron collapsing?

Many of the founders of quantum had a major interest in spiritual matters. Niels Bohr used the yin/yang symbol in his coat of arms. David Bohm had long discussions with the Indian sage Krishnamurti. Erwin Schrodinger gave lectures on the Upanishads.durgapuja_eyes

We stand on the shoulders of billions of genetic lifetimes to give us this perfect genetic body, this perfect genetic brain that it took thousands of years to evolve, so that we could have this conversation in the abstract. If we are here to be embodied in the greatest evolutionary machine there ever was, our body and our human brain, then we have deserved the right for “what ifs.”

2. Observer

My conscious decision about how to observe an electron will determine the electron’s properties to some extent. If I ask it a particle question, it will give me a particle answer. If I ask it a wave question, it will give me a wave answer.”  –Fritjof Capra


This profound shift in physicist’s’ conception of the basic nature of their endeavor, and of the meanings of their formulas, was not a frivolous move: it was a last resort. The very idea that in order to comprehend atomic phenomena one must abandon physical ontology and construct the mathematical formulas to be directly about the knowledge of human observers, rather than about the external real events themselves, is so seemingly preposterous that no group of eminent and renowned scientists would ever embrace it except as an extreme last measure.”  –Henry Stapp

Human consciousness is involved in reality as Fritjof Capra goes on to say: “The critical feature of quantum theory is that the observer is not only necessary to observe the properties of an atomic phenomenon, but is necessary even to bring about these properties. The electron does not have objective properties independent of my mind.

Before an observation or measurement is made, the object exists as a probability wave (technically called a wave function). It has no specific location or velocity. Its wave function or probability wave contains the likelihood that, when observed in a measurement, it will be here or there. It has potential positions, potential velocities—but we won’t know what those are until it is observed.

When we measure the electron’s position we are not measuring an objective, preexisting feature of reality. Rather, the act of measurement is deeply enmeshed in creating the very reality it is measuring.

There is a raging debate as to whether human consciousness (as opposed to nonhuman), is what collapses the wave function and brings the object from a state of probability to its point value.

Anytime I make a choice, there are innumerable parallel possibilities or outcomes of that choice occurring at once!quantum observer

When we understand the observer, then we have to bow to a greater mind that is forming this energy into modes of reality that we have yet to dream in our lifetime. We only perceive it yet as chaos, but its order is definite. It’s above us. It’s deeper. –Ramtha

Some spiritual traditions refer to the observer as “the still small voice.” Many spiritual traditions and practices have used the term observer to get a handle on the ineffable self, or to realize our inner nature and by observation change the outer ego self.

The Zen practice of being always present in the moment and not swept away by the external activities could also be described as staying in the observer:

“This present mind, this present moment.”


Dr. Joe Dispenza:quantum particle

We are not changing the larger objects of reality because we have lost the power of observation. Observation has a direct effect on the observer’s world. This will motivate people to focus on becoming better observers.”

quantum observer

The subatomic world responds to our observation, but the average person loses their attention span every 6-10 seconds . . . So how can the very large respond to someone who doesn’t have the ability to even focus and concentrate? Maybe we are just poor observers. Maybe we haven’t mastered the skill of observation and maybe it is a skill . . .

We should be willing to sit down every day and take a piece of our day and set it aside and begin to observe, to design a new possible future for ourselves, and if we do it properly and we observe it properly, we should have opportunities begin to show up in our lives.

Slow down the pace of time and sharpen my skills of observation and silent discernment, instead of quick verbal reacting and regretting.

Every observation can be looked upon as a quantum measurement, because quantum measurement produces brain memory. These brain memories are activated every time we encounter and experience again a repeated stimulus. A repeated stimulus will always elicit not only the original impression, but also this repetition of memory impressions.

quantum memoryWe always perceive something after reflection in the mirror of memory. It is this reflection in the mirror of memory that gives us that sense of “I-ness,” who I am, namely a pattern of habits, a pattern of memories, a pattern of past.


The above is why “A Course in Miracles” and other practices stress FORGIVENESS as the important element for changing the present.

Perception: “Before you find fault in your neighbor for the speck in their eye, first remove the log from your eye.”

Observation: “Love your neighbor as yourself.”

If reality is just the questions, or attitudes, held in the mind, and that answer lays down at the end of a long chain of memories, perceptions and observations, it’s not so much how do we alter reality, as much as it’s a wonder why we keep our reality the same. In the answer to this is the key to change.

From the quantum perspective—the universe is an extremely interactive place,” science writer Dan Winters comments in a Discover article with the provocative title, “Does the Universe Exist if We’re Not Looking?” The article summarizes Princeton physicist John Wheeler’s idea of “genesis by observership.” According to Wheeler (a colleague of Albert Einstein and Niels Bohr and coiner of the term “black hole”): “We are not simply bystanders on a cosmic stage; we are shapers and creators living in a participatory universe.”


In a materialistic society, even when it comes to consciousness, we are concerned with content over process.

A great reflection of our materialistic society is: Who are the heroes at our schools? Schools are about education, knowledge, learning—the mental life. The school heroes are the athletes—the physical life.

Our brain research has helped to illuminate higher states of consciousness beyond waking, dreaming and sleeping. There are as many as seven states of consciousness. In addition to the three that we normally experience, there’s PURE CONSCIOUSNESS. It’s the simplest state of human consciousness, a deeply settled, silent state of unbounded awareness in which the mind identifies with and experiences the unified filed of all laws of nature.”  –John Hagelin, Ph.D.

It’s an interesting point of view, this quantum bandwagon. For example is consciousness only quantum? Is it only explained by quantum physics? I used to think so, back in the seventies. I don’t think so anymore. I’m now convinced that quantum mechanics may not be enough.” –Fred Alan Wolf, Ph.D.

quantum consciousness

  • Don’t blow anything off as “just coincidence”
  • My near death out of body experiences surfing in Malibu
  • My Civil War past life regressions
  • Remote Viewing
  • Human Intent Changes Reality
  • My Miraculous Healing of 2003-2006
  • Prophetic Dreams
  • The List Goes On and On . . .

Consciousness Study Programs are appearing in my mind and at universities!

The very earliest experience, the beginning of the universe, is when pure consciousness, the unified field seeing itself, creates within its essentially unified nature the threefold structure of observer, observed and process of observation. From that deepest level of reality, consciousness creates creation, therefore there is this previously discussed, very intimate relationship between the observer and the observed. They are ultimately united as one inseparable wholeness at the basis of creation, which is the unified field, which is also our own innermost consciousness, the self.

When people have a mystical experience, they perceive it to represent a more fundamental level of reality than our everyday material reality that we normally live in. In fact, even when they’re no longer having that mystical experience, they still perceive that reality to be the more real, to represent the more truer form, the more fundamental form of reality. And the material world that we live in is kind of a more secondary reality to them.

I always create mystical experiences within my consciousness to change my reality!

–Dean Desire

If we change our heads about who we are—and can see ourselves as creative, eternal beings creating physical experience, joined at that level of existence we call consciousness—then we start to see and create this world that we live in quite differently.

–Ed Mitchell



All that we are is the result of what we have thought.
The mind is everything. What we think, we become.” –Buddha

The only way I will ever be great to myself is not what I do to my body—but what I do to my mind. Ultimately whatever I do with my mind affects my body because it’s all the same thing. It reminds me to get out of mind/body consciousness and into mind=body=reality consciousness.” –Ramtha

My desire is to become a very well qualified meditator, a highly inner-self managed individual who goes into deep meditative states using mind, intention and emotion to create my reality.” –Dean Desire

You know everyone talks about mind over matter. But that’s still a dualistic way of seeing reality. What we have learned is that in order to fold time and space and travel to other galaxies, you must see Mind AS Matter.” –Ramtha gay sex

Mind over matter over mind over matter over—it’s just another tangled dualistic hierarchy, another chicken and egg aspect of the universe. But as Ramtha notes, that view is intrinsically dualistic. Dualism pervades these concepts: subject/object, in there/out there, science/spirit, and consciousness/reality. What about mind as matter, and therefore, matter as mind? Therefore, subject as object, in there as out there, science as spirit and consciousness as reality.

  • What prejudices do I have that prevent me from making a complete and utter transformation to a new paradigm? wow seqence
  • How do those prejudices reflect in the things in my reality (my stuff)?
  • What is “my stuff”?
  • Is it possible that by knowing that those things are a manifestation of my thoughts, I could easily manifest new things based on my new paradigm?
  • If thoughts can do that to water,

imagine what they can do to us.

  • What the heck are my thoughts doing to my reality?
  • I must question my every thought

We have to meditate and reach non-ordinary states of consciousness before we become the creator of our own reality:

quantum reality

As above so below, as within so without,

Is the fundamental, true way to see the world.

consciousness = physical reality

mind = matter

spirit = science

transcendental self = nature

god = things

Without the illusion of dualism, there is no connection or cause and effect (or fence). It is all the same thing. Everything is interdependent—which is what explorers and adventurers in consciousness have always maintained.

This is the only radical thinking that you need to do, but it is so radical:

Even the material world of chairs, tables, rooms and carpet, all of these are nothing but possible movements of consciousness. And I am choosing moment to moment out of those movements to bring my actual experience into manifestation.

All of this led Fred Alan Wolf in the ‘70’s to coin the term:

“I created my reality.” The then emerging New Age movement immediately seized upon this phrase and made it part of their paradigm. But as many physicists went on to say, it’s not a simple concept to really grasp fully. “You’re not changing the reality out there; you’re not changing trucks and bars and machinery and rockets taking off—you’re not changing those.”

If by you, you mean the egotistic person “you”, the personality “you” that you think is running the show creates your reality, that is probably wrong. But if you mean “you” the cosmic connected soul that is co-creating reality with point zero, you are probably right.

It became clear that the place where I choose to create my own reality, that place of consciousness, is a very special non-ordinary state of being where the subject/object duality splits and disappears. It’s from this non-ordinary state that I choose, and therefore the exaltation of the New Ager disappeared when it was forced to face the reality that there really is no free lunch. We have to meditate and reach non-ordinary states of consciousness before we become the creator of our own reality.

So the concept “consciousness creates reality” brings up the question: “What level of consciousness is creating my reality?”

Most of our individual little thoughts don’t immediately go out and manifest as change in the universe because most of the universe doesn’t care about our common everyday small and meaningless thoughts and idle fantasies. Sex and cars and money, bla, bla, bla. The lack of immediate gratification in creating our own reality could be to protect us from ourselves. If every fast thought we had was manifested we would spin around like a toy and die. We don’t ever really know what the fuck we want. Theta consciousness has to focus thought with deep intention so that only what we really really repeat in our consciousness will manifest, for our own protection.


Two of the fundamental ideas on creating my day are the how and the why.

HOW: Consciousness, energy and emotion create the nature of reality,

WHY: and attitude is everything.

Contrary to American youth culture, the Chinese know and manifest that older people are to be held in high esteem because they have wisdom, and also that they perform as well as the young, there is no such thing as memory loss or sensual/mental decline, and older is better.

It is attitude! I have no guilt about my lifestyle, it is the best! 

If it’s personal, we call it an attitude—it it’s cultural, we call it a paradigm—if it’s universal we call it a law. “As within, so without.”

Law = Universal
Paradigm = Cultural
Attitude = Personal


Be the spiritual scientist in my own life.
Create the reality of healing my own emotional addictions.
Transcend ordinary consciousness and bust the old paradigms!

Dani Olivier6_redhawk_credits


I live the life I love and I love the life I live.  –Willie Dixon (American Bluesman)

The question is not does consciousness create reality, but how far do I take the fact that Consciousness Creates Reality? Am I going to create the girl of my dreams today? What will happen in my new quantum career today? And whose life am I creating today, anyway?

We’re reality-producing machines. We create the effects of reality all the time. If we take information from a small knowledge base, we have a small reality. If we have a large knowledge base, we have a large reality.”  –Joe Dispenza

“I created a novel titled: “The Reality Engine” because I am a reality engine.”  –Dean Desire

When I have my first cup of coffee in the morning, it is clear that it is the “egotistic person” or the personality known as Dean that decided on the details, and not the transcendental, immortal self, or the soul now known as Dean Desire.

divine quantum schizmThis divine schizophrenia goes by many labels: ego/true self, personality/divinity, son of man/son of god, mortal body/immortal soul, (bicameral mind of Julian Jaynes, personality/soul of Gary Zukav). The goal of enlightenment is to erase this fragmentation of self and create from one source. Which is why “Who am I” works to expand our consciousness until we are conscious of all of our creations and become enlightened.

I right back where I started before I got into AA in 2004: The personality is a finite defense mechanism that drinks alcohol to cope, the soul is the infinite entity that allows me to rise above it all and live my true destiny of desire.

My personality would never have created my personal holocaust of 2003, but as all spiritual traditions maintain, there is more than one “me”. My soul laid the tragic framework for my retribution, repentance and redemption of my personality. I even got intentionally busted stealing a homosexual’s cigarettes to that I could heal three instincts at once, sexual (coming out as androgynous), security (kleptomania), society (forget what they think).  –Dean Destiny

I create my day” is an amazing tool for this expansion of consciousness. Every time I reject my part in creating reality, I am rejecting or denying a part of myself and the fragmentation occurs.

Enlightenment says that the spirit half of me is creating these realities for the soul purpose of becoming whole. There are many things I must experience to grow that are not my ego/personalities first choice:

  • My Choice of University Degrees
  • My Choice of Career, Residence, Lovers
  • My Sexuality and Preferences

The above were not the first choices of my ego personality! This is called karma, I did create these things, at some time in the past, whether recent or remote, all the conditions that we are faced with in this life.

HOW IT WORKS quantum lesson

The universe is the computer. Non-duality. The universe doesn’t respond to us—it is us.

The dualistic (Western) model of karma says: I hit Bob, so someone will hit me. It’s a very cause effect (a.k.a. Newtonian) way to view this phenomena. But from the non-dualistic, entangled (unified, connected) model, it’s different. It says that action or thought (which are the same “thing”) arises in a piece of my consciousness. There is a certain frequency or vibration associated with that. By taking the action, I endorse that reality so that I am now connected to the universe by that frequency or vibration. Everything “out there” of the same frequency will respond to it, and they will then be reflected in your reality.

By this notion, everything in my life—people, places, things, times and events—are nothing but reflections of my signature vibrations. According to Ramtha: “Everything in your life is frequency specific to who you are.” So if I want to know “Who Am I?” just look around; the universe is always serving up the answer. My friends, lovers/relationships, place of residence, career, body/mind/soul are all the direct reflection of my signature frequency.

The problem is that the hidden, repressed parts of us are also reflected, and we repress them because we don’t like them or don’t know how to manifest them into reality. It’s those reflections that make us say: “I would never create that.” And it’s that which keeps getting reflected back over and over until we understand it. That’s the wheel of karma.

CONCSUS Louis Markoya_HyperrealistAbstractmed_creditsMy Kharmic Dharmic Drama Rama Affirmations

  • I Always Meet Kind, Positive People Who Love and Accept Me.
  • I Am a Quantum Motivational Speaker.
  • The Universe Freely Gives Me Energy (Money).
  • God gives me everything I want and need.
  • I am the Prophet of The Cult of the PIBB (Petite Brown-Eyed Brunettes)

Unto the pure all things are pure; but unto them that are defiled and unbelieving is nothing pure; but even their mind and conscience is defiled.  –Titus 1:15

Victimization is Rejection of Creating Your Own Reality

Perceiving one’s self as a victim is possibly the strongest rejection of “I create my own reality.” The victim says: “This situation happened to me. It is unfair and unwarranted. The corollaries of this are: “Poor me. The Universe is unjust. Karma is a part-time, fickle operation.”

The upside of this negative attitude is: You get sympathy, get to feel good about yourself because it’s not you, and you can blow off the experience and not have to deal with your part in it.

The downside is: You just endorsed the idea that you don’t create your reality (and thus are disempowered to do so), and you will get this lesson again and again and . . . It also is a fragmentation from reality. It removes the Creator from the Creation.

quantum powerEverything I do is my decision and my responsibility. 

I accept responsibility. 

I accept as given fact that my life and its happenings are created by me, so therefore I look for the meaning in them. It is not a philosophical, cosmic meaning, but rather a nuts and bolts–who I am, or what I am creating, or what in my life am I denying?

The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances that they want, and if they can’t find them, make them.”  –George Bernard Shaw


Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Life the life you’ve imagined.”  –Henry David Thoreau

It is a hypothesis that consciousness is the ground of being. It’s all possibilities of consciousness. Out of these possibilities of itself, consciousness chooses the actual experience that it manifests, that it observes . . . quantum is talking about possibilities, but when you look at yourself, how many times have you wondered “what possibilities”? Your wondering of possibilities . . . [might be] confined to such trivial things like what kind of sex would I choose this time, women or men, fuck or be fucked, suck cock or eat pussy, which depends on your past experiences totally. So you miss the quantum physics of your life: What style of astounding prophet should I be today?

quantum living

The possibilities are spread out like the probability waves of an electron. This means those options in your life are as “real” as those waves predicted by the Schrodinger Equation.” –Amit Goswami

Each conscious thought can be thought of as a choice, a quantum superposition collapsing to one choice. So let’s say you’re looking at a menu, and you’re trying to decide whether to have shrimp, pasta, or tuna fish. Imagine that you have a quantum superposition of all these possibilities coexisting simultaneously. Maybe even you go into the future a little bit and taste the different meals. And then you collapse all of these realities into the decision, ‘Ah-ha. I’ll have spaghetti.’” –Stuart Hameroff

Going into the future happens in our minds. In quantum theory you can also go backwards in time, and there’s some suggestion that processes in the brain related to consciousness project backward in time.

If all these theories prove to be correct, that means that an individual’s consciousness is constantly scanning all the future possibilities, maybe even going into the future to “taste” whether to marry someone or not, and then focusing, or collapsing that chosen possibility into reality. The “how” gets handled by the immensely interactive superintelligent universe that automatically responds to consciousness because that’s what it is. The universe is the computer that keeps track—that’s why it’s here. And if it can create self-replicating, self-conscious life forms, it can fix a flat tire.

And how does this view make creation more conscious? Well, to many people the future is on the other side of a great wall, past which they cannot go. So those possibilities lurking out there are not seen, and when they do show up it’s a surprise, or a shock. But realizing that those potentials are real, and they can be developed, manipulated and collapsed, takes us over the wall and into the future where the new you awaits.

spiritual experience creating my dayCREATING MY DAY

My pool of already created reality lies out in front of me. Smeared out across the landscape of time, whose possibilities await “the moment of consciousness” to bring the actual event into experience.

Since I am proactive quantum man, I am not willing to sit back and let the universe just happen to me, I refuse the weeds and trash that the diMino’s, Astrid, K.C., Robbie and other small minds choose for me. Rather I choose the reality of Dean Desire of becoming a quantum hero and meeting Jack Kornfeld, living on the beach in Malibu, making huge sums of money and having astoundly liberating sex. Working out at a fabulous gym on the Pacific Ocean and meeting incredible people. These things are all my conscious intentional creations. Now I even go to a public library in Pacific Palisades instead of the Valley, because, I create my day.

No masters worth their salt ever let the day happen to them; Rather, they create their day.” –Ramtha

I created sushi with Bennett, the Palisades with Robbie and pasta with Erik, leading to my confident first speeches on quantum theory, I create my life.

quantum day creation

The following is from the DVD:

Ramtha: Create Your Day — An Invitation to Open Your Mind:

You know the moment you wake up, have you ever noticed, by the way, that you don’t know who you are, and you wake up and you don’t know who you are. Have you noticed how you look around the room to orient yourself, and what is really surprising is when you see the person next to you and for that split moment you don’t know who they are? I think you should contemplate that a lot. We spend the next moments before you ever get out of bed reorienting, rebonding with an identity that for a moment we didn’t even have, and the identity is that [thing] we start to form when we take a look at the person next to us. And then we get up, and we start scratching our bodies . . . and then we get up and go to the latrine and on the way we look at ourselves. Why do you do that? Why do you stare at yourself? Because you are trying to remember who you are. It is still a mystery.

But if you have to remember who you are and remember the parameters of your acceptance and the fence of your doubt, if you have to go through the ritual every single day to remember who you are, what are the chances that your day is going to turn out unique? . . . Very slim indeed. But what if . . . before you tried to remember who you were, that you remembered what you wanted to be, and maybe that came first before you saw your mate, before you started remembering what people are currently taking up your mental space and time, before you started thinking about yesterday and looking in the mirror to remember who you are.

tumblr_mjkh9cMGV61qjplvno1_500Before you did all of that you remembered something: Before I bond to the ritual of my neuronet, I am going to create a day that is astounding, that will add to my neuronet, that will add to the experience of my life,’ and you create your day—create your day. In that moment you are not yet who you are is the most sublime moment in which in that moment you see the extraordinary, you can expect and accept the unordinary, you can accept a pay raise today. If you become yourself, your expectation of a pay raise greatly diminishes. You and I both know that. But in this one state of nonconclusiveness about your identity, you can create anyway.”

So Ramtha tells her students, before you get up and remember who you are, create your day. Then after you create your day, your routine will change. You will become a slightly different person starting at the urinal, looking in the mirror. The will be something different about you and that will be a wonderful thing.”

Desire Dean Destiny’s creating IS new character, coming from the God self, the higher self, in which case it is and always has been usually unconscious and the workings of deeply buried Karma of my lessons here in Earth School.

3 animated gears


I have always know this. Throughout the decades I have been “creating my own religion,” creating my new character, creating my higher self. Moving to Mystic Malibu is the end of my old life and the beginning of CREATING MY LIFE!

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