Sex training and body awareness begin with a deeper experience of the primal erotic experience: touching yourself. There is nothing wrong with touching yourself. Self-touching is often denigrated as playing with yourself, as if something is wrong with that. There is nothing wrong with playing with yourself. Sometimes improper social and cultural sex training can stigmatize self-touching. There is nothing wrong with touching yourself as part of your personal sexual rebirthing.
Sometimes unresolved trauma can have a desensitizing affect on a man’s ability to touch himself in a meaningful way. Core Energetics and Somatic Body Experiencing are two professional sexual trauma healing modalities that have been effective for me.
The ability to self-regulate your emotions is one of the most important aspects of sexual enlightenment. The lack of emotional intelligence is at the root of many problems. The purpose of this article is to underscore the importance of self-touching in sex training.
Sex Training is Emotional Training
The quality of your emotional experience determines the quality of your sexual experience. I had to learn how to open up my heart and feel my sexuality instead of merely experiencing sex on a rational and intellectual level. There was no touching and hugging in my family. Yesterday in line at the supermarket the woman in front of me was the same ethnicity and physical build of my mother. Her fourteen year old son came up and hugged her and she hugged him back. By observing the two of them I healed my awareness that I never had that with my mother. My awareness of my mother’s dissociation became a healing emotion.
I can see now how my mother taught me to drift into altered states of consciousness. Now I have to refocus this character trait into spiritual perception. Wilhelm Reich says that the schizoid character is better able to receive the energy of the universe. I am beginning to intuit and control spiritual and other extra sensory perception. As a result of my sex training I am undergoing a life change. I am transmuting myself into a different way of being.