Black Bhajanism

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   Good Bhajanists Are Visually Oriented   

Sikhs condescendingly refer to Kundalini Yogis as Taught by Yogi Bhajan as “Bhajanists”.  What if you found out that your trendy new yoga religion was just one big slick advertising campaign with no real substance?  Guru Singh non-nonchalantly tells his yoga classes that he made up Bajanism in a Melrose Avenue Bookstore with alleged Sikh holy man Yogi Bhajan. 

Mr. Bhajan was a savvy entrepreneur and marketing genius who instructed his disciples to use attention grabbing images when creating yoga flyers.  In his textbook, The Aquarian Teacher, Bhajan also warns that a yoga teacher will be reincarnated as a cockroach for leading students astray with the type of spiritual ego displayed by smiling Guru Singh. 

good bhajanists use striking images
Use a striking illustration  -Yogi Bhajan, The Aquarian Teacher, p. 292

   A Good Bhajanist Uses Striking Images   

If you want to start your own religion go out and hire the best marketing talent you can afford.  Create a sharper image. Guru Singh used a Canadian advertising agency called Taylor and Trout.  He probably got a cheaper rate by using Canadians because it shows in the work. 

Forty years ago when I first saw the Bhajanists milling about in their white togs I was a PA for Tantra Films videographer Ron Harris.  Driving my ’64 Plymouth Valiant all over West LA & Beverly Hills in 1981, I would see the Bhajanists running around and I erroneously assumed that the brilliant white turbans & head to toe get-ups were because they didn’t want to get skin cancer.  

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 KEYS TO SUCCESS:  Celebrity Photographer + Top Advertising Agency = The Guru Singh Brand!  

Just walk into any Melrose Avenue advertising agency, show them this Guru Singh layout and tell them that you want to go up one or two Kundalini Levels higher. It cannot be stressed enough:  Take the pictures and they will come.  Anybody can be a successful West Hollywood yoga guru and this blog will explain how.

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   Good Bhajanists Are Synergistic   

Bhajanism means to synthesize, hybridize and create your own guru brand.  The key to creating a successful guru brand is to look at several professional photographer portfolios before making your decision.  Hiring the right advertising agency and photographers means hiring expensive talent. 

The actual religion you can make up later, preferably in a Melrose Avenue Bookstore.  You won’t need original content right away you can just borrow from Sikhism or some other religion like the early Bhajanists did.  Clothing, music, incense, lighting and style are more important.  Just copy what the Bhajanists are doing for now. 

      Rhythm & Style        |  Warm your audience up by giving them cultural touchstones that they are already familiar with.   Sing them a few warm cozy folk songs while softly strumming your guitar.  Lull your loving devotees into a sense of familiar complacency by using pop culture hypnosis.  That’s how Charlie Manson did it.  Rhythm & Style.  That’s what the kids want these days.  Rhythm & Style.  

good bhajanists play guitar

BHAJANIST LIFESTYLE  |  Drink Yogi Tea  |  Play Yogi Guitars  |  Buy Yogi Swag    

Now from the same people that brought you Yogi Tea, say hello to Guru Brand Yogi Guitars, played by gurus worldwide.  Guru brand guitars are used by Guru Singh and all kundalini yoga teachers.  

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DIGITAL INCENSE & PEPPERMINTS | Bhajanist Partial Product Line

Sometimes Kundalini yoga seems like one big multi-level marketing ponzi pyramid to sell teacher training and other yoga products.  Walk into the lobby at Yoga West on Robertson Blvd. and observe the broad band of merchandise for sale.  Clothing, crystals, candles, CD’s, animal fur yoga pads, yoga mats, tea, sacred stones, books, art, statues, incense & peppermints, etc. 

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  Good Yogi’s Give Great Visuals!  

The purpose of this article was to create Black Tantra images as a Bhajanist experiment in creating your own religion.  A lot of kundalini yoga is contained in the artwork for the yoga classes.  There is not much authentic old school Saraswati Kundalini yoga to kundalini yoga as sold by Yogi Bhajan but there are lots of really cool Bhajanist images. 

There is no Black Tantra, I made it all up, but I’ll bet there are plenty of starry-eyed suckers willing to line up on Robertson Blvd. to pay $60 for a two-hour Black Tantra ritual at Yoga West because:  Good Bhajanists give great visuals!

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